What to write...?

‘How to write effectively’? I know that it’s an effortless question. We can gather up a lot of answers to this query. Even I am also thinking the right answer right now. Because, I badly needed to tune my time effectively. I am being put in bed now, after a cruciate ligament surgery! It was a pitiable football injury which made me to think of ‘how to write effectively?’ But, are there any other activities which I can go for? My sister Asha told me “Obviously there are, Ambyetaa... Watch Hollywood movies on your loaded lappy. Or, be a voracious worm on any blissful books” It was so easy for Asha to offer options like this. But, along with my health state, my mental state was also chaotic! Because, I was a speedy, energetic and smart ‘complan boy’, who runs, jumps and rolls over all over the country! 

So, this 2 week bed-rest was like beyond my tolerance limit. There was no pain on my knee, since the surgery went successful. But, my dynamism got shrink from this disability. I had to use damn crutches even to go lavatory :( I was merely undergoing a sort of suffocation, irritation and utter blankness!

So, I thought of proposing ideas into articles, keeping an optimistic anticipation in mind, that writing will help me out to regain my mental peace during this toughest tenure of my 'so far life'. But, seriously I don’t know that ‘how to capture public attention to my articles in this busy, moreover lazy world’! I asked to my friend Dhanesh Poduval, the same question. He opined “When you write, don’t hide anything. Don’t be frightened of anyone or anything. Bring everything out of your mind without censoring or filtering’’ Poduval was right. When we write, we should be least bothered or no longer bothered about those who read it. Need to assume that, we are going to delete the document completely. So, the genuineness will flow effortlessly. But, what should be the topic? How to start? How to find a sexy thread? These funny queries started pondering out in me. 

And, I thought about the length of the passage to be made. I am a 'Malayalam medium product'. So, for me, writing an article in English is like 'sending fish for space research'! Because, my vocabulary is awfully puny. And, when i think about grammar and spelling i can still sense the tenderness of Kunhiraman sir's 'cane stick wound' at the back of my left thigh :) Oops! So, I can’t even think of a passage beyond 2 - 3 pages. I silently, but enviously admired Sidney Sheldon, who had been a 'dad' to more than 20 novels with pages ranging on an average of 400 respectively! So, :) I really better go and munch peanuts to kill my time, rather than thinking about making an article! But, Once upon a time even ‘he’ was also a debut in the field of writing, I self consoled :)

“If you read any honored books, then you can feed well the starving writer in you. It will help you out to collect plenty of raw materials to manufacture an article of your own”. It was my friend Bhavya Mohan’s dominant answer. It was really sound. She ushered me to her blog, wherein she made her own world out of flavored language. But, the intensifying gloom in which I was put in, made me reluctant to obey Bhavya. No mood to read. Moreover, no mood to EAT my mom’s hand-made cuisines too! I was in such an excruciating boredom.

Well, no scarcity for inspiration for me from my lovable friends. But, still I was dubious about the minimum expected quality to be maintained to my new born essay! Anyway in case if I mould an article, i am surely going to expose it before my lecturers, friends, relatives and any magazines if possible. He he.. So, I should be so careful in preparing the same. Or else, all these will start blaming me or at the most, they will persuade my dad to pack me to a mental hospital!

I thought of writing about 'my love towards football' and the result I got out of it, i.e. a 2 year long full fledged injury series. That brought tons of evils into my sweet life! One more thing, if I focus on my ‘pathetic self story’, which will sprinkle sentimental powder on all. And, it will easily grab the reader’s market. But, attaining an emotional edge through portraying the dark episodes of the life is an antiquated and cheap technique used by the quixotic writers with narrow imagination! I am not that cheap. And I do have talent, creativity and imagination. I mean, I hope so :)

'What if i put down some real life situations from my own life?', i thought for a while. But, who will be interested to peep into my boring life?! I badly realized the fact :( Gradually, I turned disappoint for not being found with a topic to go on. I decided to sleep during day time. That I don’t do usually. I had had no practice of sleeping in day time. But, I heard from Arathy that, if you sleep in day time you will happen to meet with uncanny nightmares! Sorry, ‘day-mares’! :) So, I spent hours and hours at sleeping soon after my lunch to get an apt sperm required to deliver my article.

It was an amazing experience. Sleep in day time was worthwhile for me as a good pass of time. But, I haven’t met with any dreams! So, my plan of preparing an article remained as a dream! My mind was in 'tabula rasa' still! I cursed Arathy for her feeble advice. Damn it! I shared my worries with my mate Anoop. He consoled me “It is so easy to prepare an article. Log on to www.google.com, and enter your topic. Within no time your article will be ready there. The only effort needed is, you have to copy-paste the contents onto your blog”! He might think that, I am writing articles to impress people and to build an image before them. And, he failed to recognize that, what I wanted was self actualization and relief. I befell so poignant. 

Finally i decided to consult with my best friend Arsha. I know that it will be my final step. And, either i will happen to launch my article or i will eternally bring my plan of sentence creation to a halt after hearing Arsha. She's not only my friend. She is like my 'guru'. Because, she made me to purchase '5.someone' through a strong brain waving tablet, before 1 year. That was the first English novel i read. Cheers to anju :) So, i submitted my spiralled worries on behalf of Arsha. And, her answer was not that interesting. She blindly told me 'Ohh! Amby.. So you are gonna write article! huh? Dont make me and the society laugh at you.. okay?' I blanched! I wondered with excitement, 'how come this bloody friend knows that i can't write well?!' I blatantly grinned at myself with a bitter disenchantment .. :(


I asked god, ‘when I can publish my own article?’ And god replied that …… :)

“@ Last I met Amby...”

This is an episode or incident report from my own daily life. But, What's extraordinary about this? Here it is, I am writing this one as if I am Siju - the gentle figure shown in the picture below! He is my soul mate! This 'gulfer' met me during his holidays in Kerala. And, we spent a night at his home. Its a simple review of the same. So, I prepared this through Siju's view. One more thing to say. I wrote this one, only for my friends Siju, Nighilesh (Nigu) and Anoop (My core friends, who overwhelmed me with uppermost love and care during my degree life in Mangalore and lived in a hostel room for 3 consecutive years). Because, I hope none else can TASTE this passage in its complete vigor, since you all are ignorant about the chemistry between 'I and Siju'! So, don't curse me if you didn't UNDERSTAND this, after reading.. okay? :) Also, you might feel as if I have started this passage from 'no-where' and have ended at 'no-where'! Well.. :)

 “@ Last I met Amby... - Siju”

I saved around 79 dirhams (i.e. around Rs.1000!), by letting Amby (Ambareesh YMC) not with me to Trivandrum. I think I managed it cleverly, when he asked me “Da, Polayaa (my holy nick name.. :( ..)... shall I come with you to Trivandrum?” And I replied, “Oh, No Bro, actually one of my relative is already escorting me to Trivandrum, so better let's meet up later”. Moreover I thought it will be a 'just for joke-deal' for Amby, if I let him know that “I am carrying ‘gulf-gold’ to Trivandrum to hand it over to one of my colleague's father”! “Who will request a perfect and professional robber to assist, especially when carrying a confidential golden bunch!?”

So, somehow I managed to block Amby in assisting me. Silly Amby, moron.. :) He doesn't even know about that! But, I want to meet him as soon as possible. Because, I know that he always has an exclusive offer of Love towards me. And, I too draw same or much more amount of love toward him.

It was a sunny Saturday noon. I was on my way back from Trivandrum to Pazhayangadi by train. I haven’t had lunch even though i was ravenous. Because, it is so expensive it seems, to have a lavish dish named Biryani from the train catering team. 'Cheap in quality (and quantity) and best at price'! So, with a belly full of gas I was simply searching for 'cute lips' among the fleshy co-travelers in my boggy. But, I hardly found any. Arabi-ladies are far better than Malayali ladies - I bottom lined. The 'fairness' which Arabi-ladies have on their palms and face cannot be found even at the most hidden regions of Malayali-ladies! The unfair natural justice - yuck! 

I was so tired from journey, and I thought of having a calm sleep at home tonight on my snug bed, without any disturbances. Because of my fatigue I was merely about to befall sick. That much tired from this arduous journey.

Suddenly my cell rang. it's Amby. He said me “Da, let's come to the point! I’m coming your home today with Anoop for an overnight stay to rockkk! but, don’t arrange a well equipped non-veg. dine for us”! And he giggled innocently. Ohh.. No.. my Gosh! I really shivered of tension and nervousness; I became feverish and edgy with a profuse perspiration. Because, I know that Amby will come surely and he will convert my tranquil and systematized home into a battle field and thereafter into a cattle shed! 

Because, Still I remember a critical Amby-incident. That is, he don’t even throw away the chicken leg piece's 'bone'! He will lick and suck the entire 'brownish' asset inside the bone, which is even kept out of Nigu’s plate. It will go straight into his holy mouth! Kidneys and livers too salivate him the more. These all are his 'Jeevan tones'; i still remember his shameless public claim! He is also an eminent "fish head sucker". Such a “Bhooloka thara”! BUT, I just love him beyond limits; history was woven in such a way which do not require any up-gradation on regular intervals! I like him as a whole. He always keeps us happy through his course of fun. What's great about him is, he sacrifices his self esteem, pride and personality to let OUR face turn cheery through sprinkling loads of dusty idiocies.. :)

The 'Lokamanyan'(Amby) is coming from Kasaragod to Pazhayangadi station. So, he might have started from his home. Time is going so quietly. He kept on calling me. Even my Chechi's also coming by the same train, but I didn't tell Amby. Let him meet Chechi later. I called my home and told my dad to "get some 3 .. no no 4.. no no no 3 is enough.. or els 4 kgs of chicken", both for Anoop and Amby. Amby may need further more! And, I persuaded my amma to prepare tasty stuffs, rather than usual 'local' cooking module (Kanji, burnt Pappadam, green moong and coconut Chammandy)! And, I called my chechi to keep home tidy, which Amby will observe surely. And, I also requested chechi to keep all my 'gulf luxury items' inside a bag and hide it from the ‘public area’ of Amby’s 'expected bed room'. But, by hearing this, chechi screamed “Go away foooool, what kinda friend you are!?” I hung up the call with a piece of anger and whispered myself “That is the type of bond between i and Amby! Having no formalities and full of jokes, like 'Mukesh N Mohanlal' in 'Boeing Boeing', an old priyadarsan-movie.” And I laughed without noise. All others sitting near to me were observing my frantic laugh! Opps.. :)

After a short while, as I expected, I got call from Amby. He reached at Pazhayangadi station it seems. But, my train was creeping :( And therefore, I made him wait there for consecutive 3 hours. But, he will wait for me I know even for 2 days without any solid or liquid! I know he loves me that much. "That is the chemistry between i and Amby." I am so happy to repeat these last sentences. So i do.. :)

Then, I called Anoop. But, he told "Da, i may not come"! I thought about the 'lost kgs of chicken' for which my dad already ordered and paid! What a heck! But, I thought it is okay, and tolerable for a 'gulf born baby' like me. And I relaxed. But, it will be extremely tough deed for me to handle Amby in absence of Anoop. It is going to be so catastrophic at my home tonight I assumed.

Well, Anoop reminded me “Da polayaa..(Huh, indeed i am a 'nair-groom'), see whether Amby weeps out or not at the moment you guys confront, its been after 1 year.. eh? :) He usually breaks into tear when he meets Nigu! hehe..” Well, that sounds pretty interesting :) So, actually I wanted to witness that interesting scene. So, I curiously waited for that moment without patience.

At last that crucial time beckoned me. The train reached pazhayangadi station. I got down. Amby will definitely ask about my co-traveler(my relative). So, I prepared myself to combat with Amby through a concrete-lie though i lied already earlier. But, he is not that easily-fooled guy I know.

I landed the platform. I started searching Amby’s reddish face. I expected Amby in ‘mund and shirt’. But!!! He looked so awesome in his pretty modern apparels! He wore a red T-shirt and a cargos pant. He looked luxurious too. At last our eyes met each other. He rushed towards me and embraced firmly. He grunted, “Ende Polayaa..” That was heartening. And I looked onto Amby’s face. Anoop was right! Amby’s eyes turned watery and bloodshot! I was unable to detect whether Amby is crying or smiling! Even I was also about to lose my control by meeting my most sincere friend, who lived with me for 3 fruitful years together in a hostel room. After a long time I had a really worthy moment in my life now. I felt. So, now I am with my dearest friend. I felt extremely proud to be having this sort of thorough friendship with this fool. My sweet rascal!

We started having some funny 'boyish-talks' each other. He asked me, “where is your relative, who assisted you to Trivandrum?” And I replied only through a feeble ashamed smile. Amby understood the fact :( But, both of us enjoyed that fun. And, had a lolz :)

As I expected, he started commenting at my new and 'made in gulf build'. In his opinion, "I turned 'piggy-fat' and attained a good color, texture n smell!" We board an auto-rickshaw and reached new-bus stand, Pazhayangadi. I started showing my ability to squander. I treated him heavenly with fruit shake and hot peanuts! I fed his tummy chock-full with a BIG mug of mango shake for the time being(it will reduce his in-take at my home gradually! I applied my wisdom and thinking power). :) But, Amby was extra conscious to be in hunger n being unquenched, only by having less at the restaurant.

I evoked my olden hostel days now, whereas I used to spend Rs.60 to freak out and enjoy for a week! Either 1 plate of half Chinese noodles (with more watery sauce) OR a Lassi/day! I thanked god for leading me to this 'royal position'. I was a miser. Still I am so, but a sophisticated miser! I perplexed Amby with my money power. I think, he too enjoyed my well being of financial stability. We packed some fruits and cakes to home.

Amby changed a lot in his appearance I felt. He has gone modern. His complexion has been tremendously improved. His muscles also grew better. And, about his character, I would say, he acquired a positive change. He looked so gentle and smart. But, he tried himself well to keep his old 'standard of being with me'. I felt like, Amby will be same in front of me although after N number of years gone. That is Amby, my own Amby!

So, We did board a rick again and reached Neruvambram, 'my world-famous home town'.. :) I took him to my home for the first time since our friendship of lengthy 5 years. Yes, our friendship is like wine, which will 'decay' tastier year by year!

We got in to house. I introduced my dad, mom n sister to Amby. “Achaa, meet my EVER BEST FRIEND, Amby”.. That was my dialogue. That is the fact I know. But, I added a bit of exaggeration too. I think it might have created a great pleasure in Amby. And, soon I ran into my bed room, and kept all my precious gulf items inside my cupboard and locked. Or else Amby will bag them all, even without letting me known. He is good at stealing things from his dearest friends! I am really telling, he is a talented, gifted and artistic thief!

After my introductory session on behalf of my family, Amby started explaining the 'main points of our friendship' as I expected. He tried to exhibit his knowledge and his personality. He is basically from Karnataka-Kasaragod border; he speaks dirty cross sexual language there. But, now I wondered how well he speaks in front of my family in descriptive Malayalam accent! In between I entered my kitchen, and assured that amma is well done at work. Thank god! Then, Amma sent him to bathroom. Then, Achan told me “See Siju, you should learn a lot from him. How well he speaks. And he looks so matured in nature too, whereas you..!” :(

I assisted him to the bathroom. He showed his muscles. I looked at his chest. Its condition was rather worst! (There is an old story behind this; that I will tell you later). But, I appreciated about his built with an inner smile. 

Soon he became so amicable with all. My sister got a new younger brother I felt. I too took bath soon. Amby took out some of his library books from his bag. I think he purposefully kept it on the table to show my family that he is a voracious reader as well as an intellectual scholar! What a cheap shining! Is it? x-(

Then Chechi showed her wedding engagement albums and her most expensive sari she ever had in her life, i.e. the bridal saree worth of Rs.9000! Amby commented "Chechiii, your sense of purchase is quiet appreciable. I will call up you to select bridal saree for my fiance' okay?" And, my silly Chechi who is fool at heart believed it!

Then, Amma called us for dine. Amby stormed and occupied a comfortable seat to eat well. Actually he sat first and he called me. That too from my home! That’s Amby. Amma served rice and sambar. Amby was expecting something more I felt. I found some sign of ‘chicken-disappointment’ on his face. But, chechi served 'his' dream butter-chicken dish as much as he needed. That is why his face turned colorful. While eating, his saliva drops splashed into my nose! He was that much crazy after the 'Chicken-dead body'. At last he showed his gratitude to my amma by telling “Amme, this chicken is as same as my Amma’s chicken curry!” I knew that it is a part of his usual 'host-appraisal dialogues'. But, he may be right, I don’t know. You better ask Amby okay?

Then, after dinner, we kept 2 chairs at the front yard. And, we recalled our sweet thoughts. Chechi brought a plate of orange. We enjoyed it after a heavy dinner. Amby told Chechi that “Orange is better for digestion” And, he crammed orange pieces to his own bloody mouth spitting seeds in all directions around.

We discussed many things. Shared bulks of thoughts. We went across our entire hostel life in half an hour at a stretch. So, at the peak of our friendship spirit, we called Nigu, who is in gulf now. But, we spoke to him only for a while. His sound refreshed us. It made our adjoining more sweet. We really missed him. We called Anoop as well. I dreamed of a day on which I and Amby join Anoop and Nigu. A dream day. “God, when shall we have that heaven again?”

When mosquitoes started joining us in spite of Nigu and Anoop, we entered inside. Chechi distributed some gulf chocolates to both of us. And she told to Amby “No one is in here to finish up these chocolates!” I stared at chechi furiously and told her to SHUT UP, through action. I whispered myself “This Amby will finish the entire chocolate packets within no time chechi...”! Chechi made bed for us. And, Amby reminded about the “Bed-making” process in Hotel management course that we had studied. Chechi also contributed “Bed-making” she learned in Nursing department. Afterwards dad, mom and chechi “good nighted” and then I laid near to Amby, as we had laid before 3 years! Our dream night is on! We weren't drowsy. We sung “vellara poomala mele...” And, had a rare and amazing session. We chatted till late night and then fall into sleep.

Then, after a sweet sleep, I awoke from a beat of my chechi. Then after a bed-milk(Amby won’t have tea or coffee, that i remember still) , we brushed tooth. I showed Amby around the house. We had more and even more fun. Then we took a fresh morning bath. Amma prepared a delicious Break fast. Amby also pleased to taste last night’s Butter-chicken once more. Then, I started getting many phone calls from my relatives. And, I forced to go for marriage invitation(Marreage is in next week; my chechy will be wearing that wedding saree):). I thought “what will I do with this Amby? Will he go back to his home now or will he wait me till I come back?” I was in a dilemma. But, when I called Amby from Bahrain, he shown me an interest that he wish to assist me in marriage inviting process. Because, my chechi may be like his own chechi, for him. Yea, that is true. But, if I take him now with me for inviting process, then he may get bored easilly. And, If he come then I cant use two wheeler of my ‘Ranjithetan’(my uncle’s son).

But, Amby rushed towards me and he himself got ready to come with me. So, we dressed up well. Amby asked for perfume to get flavored. I sprayed him quiet enough. I was scared whether Amby will ask for some bottles of perfume for him to carry back his home. But, I don’t know why he didn’t ask! “HHo Amby matured; I would say”!

So, we met my Ranjithetan and started 'the work' by 10.00 am itself. It was a Wagon R car. Amby told that “I had a superb picnic” I liked his indigent comment anyway. We were treated well by our relatives from various houses. We got water, tea, Squash and even ice creams from plenty of houses. We 3 had a nice day. Amby commented at Ranjithetan “an amazing person”. And, even I too enjoyed a lot having a nice day with my Amby. Afterwards Ranjithetan went for some other official needs. I asked Amby about his opinion of having a lunch from any hotel. But, he wanted to have the same from my home. He says from my amma’s holy hand. I felt like hugging my Amby! So, we came back home by bus. Amby met his cousin on the way, as an accident. Also, with an empty stomach we had tons of fun..:)

Then we reached home. We were tired so much from the loitering. We had veg meals. I think Amby might have got disappointed of not having chicken gravy. But, he looked so contented!

Many of my relatives were there at my home. They were having pleasing discussions and fun with my dad, mom and chechi. Amby asked me “Da, shall I move now? Or else I can’t get back home before night…” suddenly my mind got depressed and turned chaotic. I know that I will meet him in next week on the wedding day. But, still I felt like losing something. I packed chocolates and bagged Amby. He asked my whole family “So.. may I ... Leave...?” Without a smile! All my family sent him with a piece of blankness. My dad ordered him with a loving privilege that “Da, come on the day before yesterday of marriage okay?” My amma asked me from near to my ear without letting Amby to hear “Da, where is that nail-cutter, the only simple thing Amby requested to bring from his intimate hearty friend from gulf?!!!” I smiled at her with extreme love to my Amby. I assisted him till bus stop. We chatted little more. At last Amby took something from his purse. And, he put it in my hand! TIPS!!!?

No, not at all... Ha ha... It was his torn train ticket intact; a typical Amby-blunder! Bus came.. He went.. I sat at the bus stop itself for a while.. Then once more I looked into the ticket he gifted me and smiled at that.. But, this time Amby’s tear streamed down through MY eyes!!!